Do's + Don'ts in Divorce

Portland Divorce Lawyers Offering Sound Advice

Divorce is a hard on the whole family. Despite the emotional upheavals and the tendency to making impulsive decisions, couples can stay focused on resolving matters with support of a skilled family law attorney. At Johnston, Root & Leibenguth, P.C., in Portland, Oregon, we offer experienced guidance and the aggressive, dedicated representation you need to succeed.

A sound relationship with you is vital to success. We take the time to know you, your needs and goals. Contact us online or call (503) 946-5373 today.

Do's and Don'ts During Divorce

Under normal circumstances spouses and parents think and act rationally when it comes to their family. In a divorce, even the most well-meaning of us can have trouble making smart decisions.

Keep a flexible, realistic perspective regardless of who initiated the divorce or why. Our experienced attorneys will help you understand and follow these practical guidelines:

Tell children they are not the cause of the divorce. Give them love and support, but don't keep them out of the process.
Set a good example for your children by not bad-mouthing or blaming your spouse around the children.
Seek professional help for coping with stress. Don't rely on your children or friends. They are not trained or prepared to help you through this difficulty.
Be honest and straightforward in negotiating with your spouse. Don't use the children as a tool—judges will see through it.
Take a practical business view to dividing property. There is no point in spending more in divorce fees than any item is worth.
Document dates and events you consider important. Memories can be unreliable.
Do not follow the advice of well-meaning friends. Judges frown on self-serving behavior.
Hire a knowledgeable attorney who knows the law, the courts and is committed to helping keep you focused on protecting your interests. Even lawyers getting divorced get help.

Sound Advice for Afterwards

It is also important to think and act in the best interests of yourself and your children after a divorce:

Make child support payments in full and on time. The children count on it for their needs and you will avoid legal trouble.
Attempt to resolve payment or visitation issues with your ex-spouse before talking to your attorney about legal action. Don't reduce a child's parenting time with your ex-spouse as punishment.
Talk regularly with your ex-spouse — especially about the children's issues. Using your children as messengers or asking questions about their time with the other parent allows children to play parents against each other, creates confusion and puts their trust and love for you at risk.

For information about helping children adjust to their new home situation and other do's and don'ts in a divorce, please contact us to schedule an appointment with our skilled divorce attorneys.